Tag Archive | Humor

Creative Writing Feature: Alternate Story Greeting Card Story

SEE FIRST VERSION OF THIS POST HERE: Creative Writing Feature!

*I made NO edits, this is how I wrote it in the class*

* This was also the original story, before the 1st one I posted. The class hated this one, but I liked my concept….although now I prefer the one I tagged above :D*

I really dislike going to work. It drives me nuts. I am not the standard pharmacist that just has a miserable time at work. I enjoy making the customers laugh, although they look at me like something is wrong.

Is it my uniform?

I stand at the register and wonder if this is true every time they turn away from me. I can’t help it, I’m eccentric.  At times when I am on the floor, I receive blank stares for what feels like longer than five minutes. As an observer, I am also really good at figuring out who is analyzing my horrendous outfit. I didn’t choose to wear these clothes; this is what I have to deal with since I started working at this dump.

The managers thought it would be a great idea for me to have on this bright red long sleeve shirt with random even and odd numbers displayed all over. I like to tell the joke of the day, “Do you know how many men it takes to screw in a light bulb?” I’ve been at this job for over thirty years, I deserve some humor every once in a while. Don’t you agree? Customers waiting for their prescriptions or refills look past me in deep thought or just roll their eyes.  They ignore me like I am a great big hole in the wall.

Do I scare them away with the perky expressions that follow my jokes? Someone once told me I remind them of the hip 70’s chic style with my big pink glasses and blue hair. My favorite fashion accessories are my earrings. Today I am wearing my light bulbs. Just as I was about to take my lunch, a handsome man appears.

He asks for his prescription for his grandma. I hand it to him, and as I am ringing him up, I am blissfully hypnotized and I don’t hear the joke slip out my mouth. He reads my name tag and says “Sally, why don’t you tell me that answer and I may take you to dinner.” I almost dropped the register as I answer, “Just one. He holds the bulb and waits for the world to revolve around him…..”

“Wake up sweetie. It’s your 18th birthday!” Kathy says to her daughter.

“Aww. Do I have to?” says Kristal as she crawls out of bed.

“Here, take this card Kris. I bought it just for you,” her mother says. Kristal snatches the card.

“Ahhhhhh!” Kristal tosses the card and quickly escapes out of her room.

“Hmm…..what’s gotten into her?” Kathy says as she places the card on the dresser.

                 ***********************************************

Catch Shade Anytime of the day! Shade is on Facebook! https://facebook.com/shadebutnoshade

© 2017 Unauthorized use and/or duplication of all material without expressed and written permission from Shade But No Shade and its author is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Shade But No Shade with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Creative Writing Feature!

Welcome back!! 

Readers today I bring to you a creative story I wrote in college in my Write Like a Woman English 404 – class by my lovely advisor/ professor at Iowa State University. She was very inspiring and enlightening. She made us her friend while keeping it professional. 

I remember at the end of the semester she prepared a dinner at her house and we had to come in our pajamas so it became a little sleepover. Everyone discussed their favorite part of the class and bonded as classmates. It was fun, the part about Iowa I like the most is the true adventures within classes and outside classes 

But back to the facts….

It was a very inspiring class and I had so much fun reading all things woman, writing as a woman and being in a class full of women!

runningit

The professor told us to choose a greeting card from a pile and create a story.

By the time the cards got to me there were many boring cards that this was the only one left that popped…

I looked at like what am I gonna make of this? 

Then trying to write a story?! Forget it. It was soooo complicated! 

I kept sitting there like 🤔🤔🤔

Then I came up with a dream concept…

From here, I’ll let you read and please PLEASE share your opinion, I know this story is silly. I wanted it to be fun and funny…..although the class couldn’t really get the joke 😝

****I have TWO edits to the story but I will post the final copy and think about posting the scrap! The scrap was more of a dream from the daughter and the official I made it feel more personalized and a connection to the character.*****

Let me know what you think! It was haaarrrdddd to write but I think I did a good job being OUT-OF-THE-BOX :).

STORY: 

Continue reading

What do you do when Writer’s Block is a pain??

You deal with it! That’s what! Take some time away from it, and come back to it or sit and ponder until the thoughts flow.

It’s a very stressful moment….

Writer’s block seems so nerve wrecking and frustrating. I’ve always dealt with it in school and just put the pen/pencil down as if I could be creative again later on in the day. I used to take a break and read a novel in hopes that when it came to that High School essay, I was prepared to defeat it with no problem.

But High School is different from college…..

Especially a University with more than one assignment due at the same damn time!

On a daily basis I was going insaneeee over assignments! The essays + creative assignments just threw me for a loop! I couldn’t deal! I know, you’re probably like whateverrrr but try 3 essays and 2 creative writing assignments due back to back, or day after day one class period after the next.

It’s your junior year of college and you have soooo much on your mind! Catch my drift? It’s a heavy load that you have to tackle one font letter at a time.

There was nothing worse than having that good ol writer’s block for an assignment and it’s due the next day!! :O Those type of assignments had me livid and I was drinking coffee as if it was water!

If you are an aspiring author like me, you can really understand what it is like to understand your next role for a character but not have a clue as to where to start! It’s your story and you still draw blanks! You’re just like “OMG why?” The logic is beyond me.

Writer’s block feels like a hugeee blank is drawn in your head and you can’t grasp why it even exists! It occurs at any given moment and all you can do is just try to recover. I don’t know about you, but it definitely gives me a headache all the time.

Could it be the fact that I’ve been writing since I was about 10 years old? 😉 I don’t know, I’m not a scientist so if you know anyone, send them my way for the answer!

Almost any student has experienced it. Have you stayed up several times and wondered why you have writer’s block so much? Is it because you’re exhausted and need more sleep? Or are you just burnt out from all the homework?

Yeah I’ve done that a lot! My major required nothing but writing and yet and sometimes I couldn’t write a thing.

You have edited that essay one time too many and you are done! That creative story just won’t work out the way you thought in your head and that professor had to be the douche to correct it? Lol

Whatever it is, it is almost as close as getting a headache….except there is no pain. But you have experienced it your whole life on many many MANY random occasions and you just want it gone!

I wish I had the solution because then I could share it with you, buuuttt I don’t!

To think I want to go back to school for my master’s too. I am NOT ready for the writer’s block cycle to happen all over again. However, I love to write and I would prefer the essays over exams any day!

I just thought I’d point out how annoying writer’s block can be….I mean why does it happen to every student? Is there something going on with our brains? Geez! Haha

Perhaps we should eat ice cream! Nothing cures the stress from writer’s block better!