(All I thought as I reread this was WHAT WAS I THINKING!! THAT COULD HAVE FLOWED BETTER!!!) (Also it is a lil creepy that I am 27 posting this story, character is 27…I was having a girl and so is the character! Only positive is I am still with my bae, we broke up a few times but that was prior to baby…..
And now as I reread this story I have lost my little girl, but you guys can read that post.)
This post was written in my Write Like A Woman class at ISU. It was so hard to write a 3 word sentence!
(Written: 12/1/13)
Sex too good. Don’t use protection. Bought First Response. Have to pee. Pee on stick. Oh no Pregnant! Damn I’m stupid. How could I? It’s his fault. He manipulates me. Says sweet things. Oh you’re sexy. Come join me. Bed too cold. I need you. I can’t resist. Under the covers. His hands smooth. Hot, lustful intentions. Damn….not again! Someone is knocking. Ugh read…sign. Do NOT disturb. We are busy. Come back later. I keep screaming. Oh….Guilty pleasures. He screams Becca! What the fuck? I am Stephanie.
Who is she? I push him. He rolls off. I get up. Shit, really Matt? You damn cheater! I’ve had enough. I’m getting dressed. Red dress on. Slips on heels. He smacks me. I kick him. He punches me. Ouch that hurts! Arm turns purple. I bite him. Scratch his throat. Then I run. He trips me. Kneel…shoe…off. I’ve got aim. Hit his head. He is raging. Walks toward me. He’s standing there. I’m crying again. Very mixed emotions. He starts crying. This doesn’t work. I’ve gotta go. The knocking stopped. It was her. It must be. Where’d she go? Purse in hand. He is shouting. Baby don’t go. She means nothing. Same old story. Write a book. I’m so done.
Walking home alone. Fuming with thoughts. Emotions running wild. Tears falling nonstop. Grown adults fighting. Who does that? I hate him. I’m freaking 27. Baby on board. I’ll raise him. Or maybe her. Hopefully not both. I’m against abortion. Time heals all. Don’t have time. I’m so confused. What’d I do? Thought we’d last. Guess imma fool. He played me. Really Becca though? She sounds familiar. Ohmygod. Please God no. Don’t tell me. Becca from school. In my class. That conniving bitch. She’s so fake. He’s all hers. I’m so done. I’m moving on. Dead beat father.
8 months past. I’m never better. Mother supports me. Together, one roof. Estrogen on high. My dad’s sweet. Daddy’s little girl. He cooks dinner. Says she’s hungry. I suppose so. I can eat. I’m getting big. She’s getting big.
Something is wrong. Ohmygod. Water just broke. Mom calls 911. I’m in pain. Damn, this sucks. She kicks hard. That’s from daddy. Ambulance arrived quickly. I hate hospitals. Gosh why me? Nasty hospital smells. Doctor is cute. He distracts me. Steph okay focus. Parents are here. I’m too scared. I miss Matt. Hormones going crazy. Anesthesia in veins. I’m feeling loopy. Eyes closing slowly.
Few hours passed. More like 23. Can’t see time. It feels late. Holding mom’s hand. Doctor comes in. Baby has arrived. She looks gorgeous. New name- Melanie. I hold her. Cutest baby ever. She’s all mine. I did that. Matt did too. Should I call? Naw I’m good. Mom’s all smiles. Dad’s half asleep. A cell buzzes. Must be mine. Mom grabs it. She picks up. Doctor walks out. Takes Melanie too. Cleans her up. That masculine voice. Matt. Is he psychic? How’d he know? Mom what’s this? She doesn’t know. This damn universe. I’m so speechless. He wants me. Mom say no! He’s not resisting. He won’t budge. Fine, I’ll talk. I say hello. He sounds sweet. He seems different. He missed me. Wants me back. He’s still single. He’s walking in. I hang up. Ohmygod. Who told him? I freakin’ smile. Mouth, No, Stop! I don’t understand. How’s this possible? We haven’t spoken. Damn these hospitals! He kisses me. I am shocked. Emotions are back. Tears seeping through. He wipes them.
Doctor enters again. I am embarrassed. I stop crying. Says Melanie’s fine. She is sleeping. Nurse brings her. She’s in bed. Cute little eyes. Sweet little smile. Smiles like me. Looks like him. Matt is smiling. Proud new dad. His first daughter. Matt looks up. Says a prayer. Looks at me. Winks very sexually. I’m turned on. It’s happening again! My fatal attraction. I look away. Mom is sleeping. Dad is too. It is late. They deserve rest. I do too. Matt’s inched closer. How that happen? Whispers in my ear. I love you. I want you. I need you. Let’s fix us. Mostly for her. She needs me. I can’t think. Wait…I…can’t. Finally, I spoke. He looks sad. Says he changed. Never wanted Becca. One night stand. She meant nothing. I’ll reconsider it. I love him. I want him. Don’t need him. Melanie does though. A happy family. Or maybe—friends. This is hard. I’m so weak. I can’t think. Must slow down. Matt’s gorgeous eyes. I’m falling again. 8 months ago. He hurt me. Now he’s here. What that say?
I need sleep. Matt does too. We’ll talk later. I doze off. Matt hugs me. Kiss my forehead. Sweet, sweet dreams. Dream about Matt. Matt and Melanie. Reading a story. Hmm…Cinderella, maybe? I can’t tell. She is laughing. He hugs her. She is 5. Reads very well. Things start fading. I hear voices. People are whispering. I wake up. Mom and dad. They are hungry. Debates over food. They notice me. Mom says hi. They are leaving. Says it’s 8am. Can I leave? My ass hurts. Laying too long.
Doctor enters slowly. “Hello,” I say. “Good Morning Steph.” I can go. Doctors best orders. Melanie is clear. He congratulates us. Says she’s wonderful. A good baby. She hasn’t cried. Well, not yet. Not since arrival. I thank him. Matt simply nods. My stomach growls. I am hungry. Have to cook. Must buy food. Specifically baby food. Today is Friday. Matt has off. He’ll go shopping. I’ll stay home. We’re leaving now. It’s very quiet. Deep in thoughts. I’m so confused. Evaluating recent events. Matt’s manipulative ways. Sweet, precious Melanie. Turn of events. Before and after. I’m a mother. Feels so surreal.
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*What do you think?? Of the conception, not the horrible flow. I might do another story like this in the future and it will be better!*
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precious familiarity concerning unpredicted emotions. http://forum.nofat.ir/entry.php?890-Create-A-Car-Games-A-High-School-Bully-Would-Be-Afraid-Of
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Ah yes, Thank you so much! 🙂
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